cant believe it. this blog has been with me so more than 3 yrs. i was reading through some of my articles. i cant even rem why i was so angry and upset while writing those articles. time really flies.
thank you for giving me this chance to vent my anger and frustration and to tear without anyone seeing. i know i wont have to hide my feelings over here.
......
i hope i can sustain for who and what i am now. i love the way i am. pls dont disturb me and turn my life up side down. maybe a bit to the left or right, but not 180 degree upside down.
Firstly...
it feels sad to be drifted away from your frens.
a group of frens whom u used to hang around with and travel with.
so close that we will meet up at least once a mth.
however, the last time i see them was already a few months back.
i've realised i'm not able to fit into their topic anymore.
not when i'm so not into the kpop culture now. i dont understand a thing that they are talking about.
haiz. what exactly happen. i admit maybe i didn't put in as much effort. but then again, i have no common topic with them now at all. how do i even start this conversation?
i don't want this to happen. i'm afraid of losing the group of them. really afraid..
secondly..
from my previous posts, you might have guess as much they're related to relationship problem.
and yes.. my love life kinda screwed up right now. totally screwed up. i didn't know how to put a stop to it.
i'm struggling with the feeling inside me.
following your heart doesn't lead you to where you should be going somehow...
i have to stop. i definitely need to stop.
but somehow i cant.
it hurts. really hurts. my hrt's bleeding inside. the pain is almost unbearable.
i dont like it when i sms to ask a question and i dont get a reply.
make me feel like a fool.
2010 started out bad for me so far. this is so not gd.
i was pondering over his words last night.
it's time to end. this is never meant to be in the first place.
i know i have to leave somehow. i have made things clear to him.
其實我知道我自己很不想放手
他每一次的一句話 都會讓我心軟
讓我越陷越深
如果沒有他的關心 我就有點失落的感覺
如果他關心我 我就會覺得很煩躁 因為他每一次的關心 會讓我更心動
他的關心出乎我意料 超出了界限
這一切如果從來沒有開始過就好
現在的我真的不之應該怎麼辦才好
